Thursday, February 08, 2007

I Got A Job

I enlisted in the air-force today, but I sort of beat up my commanding officer with my aforementioned strong hand muscles and for some reason they didn't like that. I got fired.

I decided I wanted to work for Microsoft. I decided that head CEO would be the best job for me and my brain, but then figured out it was already taken. I decided I didn't care, but unfortunately, the security guards did.

I decided I wanted to be the chief project manager for Halo 3 so I went up to the front desk and asked. They told me I couldn't. I got mad. However, the following day, the "former" chief manager mysteriously showed up bound and gagged in the back of my closet, so I decided to impersonate him as a personal favor until he got better.

Today was my first day on the job. I wrote a line of code that wouldn't compile and yelled at a lot of people. I couldn't quite figure out why the code didn't work.
I tried a few variations among them was.

"1010101100101010101010101010101010"


"Make an explosion."


"Make an explosion, please."


"Marry had a little lamb."

Oh well.

I have some stupid guy named Joe on my team. He's a lowly programmer and model artist. He was really depressed, so I yelled at him for a while to cheer him up.

-Dave The New Head Chief Of Halo III

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