Wednesday, November 29, 2006

Don't Use My Greatness, Besides You're all Wrong Anyway

I would appreciate it if the world didn't use my great blog space to advertise for their mediocre websites. I have had to delete the comment in question, so you can't see it anymore, but it disappoints me to see people taking advantage of my greatness.

Now, while I was swimming this afternoon, I discovered that the mass of the earth could be determined from the size of the waves that expand from a drop of water. I did some quick mental calculations, and discovered that the mass of the earth is not in fact 5.9742×10^24 Kilograms. In fact, it's a lot more on the scale of 5.9741*10^24 Kilograms. While some may argue that the .0001 change doesn't matter, just take into account that the whole of technology is operating on the flawed assumption that the earth has .0001*10^24 more mass than it does. Just think! This throws the whole world off kilter. If we used the correct mass of the earth in science today, my great brain has calculated that we would save something on the order of a rather large amount of electricity. This would result in the rapid reduction of pollution, as well as making the earth just a whole lot nicer.

So maybe next time they determine a so called "fact", they should ask me.

Next post I'll go over the repercussions of this huge discovery on astronomy, and if I have time, I will extrapolate the existence of the rest of the universe from an atom from a strand of my hair(from my nose to be exact).

Stay beautiful,
Dave

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hey, Dave.

You strike me as an self-obsessed megolamaniac who doesn't understand one ounce of real science. Try reading a highschool science textbook. You might learn something.

-Some Ticked-Off Guy in Atlanta

Anonymous said...

I love this blog. You are indeed great. With your permission I will return often to soak up the gloriousness of your being.